Perhaps you’ve wondered if your children should sit in business class during your next flight. Before you do it, here are some considerations.

Do you mind children in business class?

It’s simple enough to say children are fine wherever–just not so they disturb you. No matter where you sit or what you do, you can’t control other people. Everyone is optimistic that things are optimized for you. But sometimes that’s not always the case. You think nothing can get in your way but then someone surprises you. The most prevalent thought involves kids: they can exist but once they make noise, they ruin the ambience.

Of course, kids aren’t always the only problem. How about business class cabins that feature an onboard bar? It can be difficult to sleep if your seat is near that bar (which happened to us before).

So, the relevant question is: are kids acceptable in business class?

‘Belong’ is different than ‘acceptable’

Before we get into the specifics of kids in business class, there’s an important distinction to make. We’re not getting into a discussion of whether children ‘belong’ in business class. That’s a separate question that’s rooted in privilege, related to wealth. That’s not the question we seek to answer.

Instead, we’re much more interested in whether it’s acceptable that children are in the business class cabin. There are seats available, and you contemplate filling one of those seats with your child. Will others in the cabin ‘accept’ the seats going to children?

And we’re also not going to answer the question of ‘is it worth it’? That’s more on you to decide given your financial situation and how much you yourself wants to travel in the cabin. If you still have younger children, it will be difficult to separate from them, as tempting as it might be to have them fly in economy.

Unfortunately, the answer is a bit more nuanced than a simple yes or no. While we would love to say that everyone shares the same opinions when it comes to this, the reality is it’s not true. Some people are much more accepting of children than others, and that isn’t just related to air travel. So, let’s rather build out a framework that can work as reasonable guidance for most.

Children are as ‘qualified’ to sit here as anyone else

You might already know our opinion on this if you’ve been reading our articles for some time. We bring our kids along on almost all of our adventures. For the most part, we all fly in the same cabin, though we’ve also shared thoughts on what to do when we get separated.

Age in itself shouldn’t be a disqualifier. The only exception is if the seat itself has a minimum age requirement. Yes, strangely this can be a thing. Take ZIPAIR, a JAL low-cost carrier, which disallows children in their ZIP Full-Flat seat if you have anyone in your party under age 6. They claim it’s for ‘safety reasons’, but there is no restriction on other airlines using that seat. ZIPAIR uses Jamco Venture seats, which other airlines like KLM uses. KLM doesn’t have an age restriction in their business class cabin, so it’s unclear why there’s an age restriction.

However, aside from this technicality on the seat itself, you shouldn’t feel bad about bringing your children into a cabin just based on age.

Having the right attitude is of utmost importance

What’s more important than age? Having the right attitude. It’s simple enough just to say that whomever sits on a plane should know how to behave on a plane. But what exactly does that entail? Simplistically, you’ll want to remain as quiet (least disruptive) as possible and keep your belongings in your area. Children can have problems with that but adults sometimes do too.

It’s important to teach your children before you bring them into the business cabin

Before you bring your children into a business class cabin, you might want to reason with them first. Share why it’s important to mind your space and keep your belongings around you. Ask them to notice the noise level first and then try not to exceed it. Frankly, that’s a more intuitive way to ask children to lower their volume to a better level. Children might get confused if they are asked to be quiet but then notice adults still talking and the adults don’t get yelled at.

What’s a good opportunity to practice flying? How about taking a drive? This helps not just within the business class cabin but anywhere on the plane. The same principles children learn here can apply outside the plane too.

Trying to help is better than not trying

This one applies to the parents. The sad part of going on a vacation with your kids is that you’re still a parent, just in a different environment. Your responsibilities don’t disappear just because you left the house. It might not sound like much of a vacation at that point, but you signed up for this by becoming a parent.

The reasonable behavior is to attempt to control your children. Sometimes that doesn’t work well, especially with a baby that doesn’t know how to reason. We’ve been there, and we’ve had plenty of other passengers and flight attendants try to offer up assistance. Again, this is true regardless of which cabin you’re in.

If you don’t make an effort, expect a lot of nasty stares at you and/or your children. You’re not going to be welcome and at that point, perhaps it’s true that your children shouldn’t sit in business class. But as long as you try to ameliorate the problem, most will understand and won’t mind.

You shouldn’t feel obligated to bribe other passengers

Some out there swear by making little thank you packages to give to others on behalf of the child. These started becoming more highly publicized in the last decade or so as people proactively apologize for bringing their child onboard.

In my view, this is completely unnecessary. Heck, I’m not convinced it’s actually a nice gesture. If your child were old enough to understand the nuance, do you think your child would want you, the parent, admitting that you’re uncontrollable to strangers and apologizing for something that hasn’t happened?

If you attempt to control your child (even if unsuccessful), that’s sufficient enough. No one expects children to be perfect, so don’t apologize in advance out of fear that your child isn’t perfect. You’re holding your child up to an impossibly high standard and proactively punishing them for it.

It’s not necessary to do this in any class of cabin. Leave the goodie bags at home to use at Halloween. If you know your children are disruptive, don’t bring them on a plane until they’re ready.

Redeyes are tough

Here’s the real conundrum, and while it can happen in any cabin, it has the potential to be markedly worse in business class. Redeye flights can be a difficult, uncomfortable journey for anyone. And it might get worse if your child becomes a distraction.

Unfortunately, I just had this experience myself recently. This flight was going from Los Angeles LAX to Minneapolis-St. Paul MSP as a redeye. You’re only in the air for less than 3 hours, making it tough to get much sleep at all.

I was upgraded to first class after boarding, and ended up next to a child who I would estimate to be a tweener. Rather than sleep during the flight, the child played music loudly in the cabin, continuing even after the flight attendant had a chat with the child. The child kept requesting snacks throughout the flight, with wrappers ending up all over me. And the child watched TV all night, illuminating my seat at the same time.

At the conclusion of the flight, the child remarked to the parents seated behind him “guess who stayed awake all flight?” I wanted to quip, “yeah, it was me”, but I didn’t want to be confrontational. And the parents didn’t interact with the child all flight, though maybe they got sleep so it’s hard to fault the lack of intervention. Perhaps I should have rested during the day, but I was working all day leading up to the flight and I had things to do after landing.

You might want to reconsider a redeye if your child doesn’t understand or cannot understand empathy

Empathy is a very important trait to have. If someone doesn’t understand empathy–the ability to comprehend and react to the thoughts of others–a redeye flight is not the time to experiment. Having empathy will drive someone into recognizing what is and is not disruptive behavior.

Now, there’s a carveout I’d like to call out–it’s actually easier to deal with on longer flights. Transcontinental flights can be long, and the longer flight means it’s easier to get some sleep even if disrupted for part of it. In my experience, everyone is usually more accepting if there is some brief, infrequent disruption. On a shorter flight, which can include East Coast U.S. flights to Europe, it’s harder to expect accommodation.

And if you have an infant, practically all flights for the child could be a redeye. Our children frequently napped on takeoff and landing while nursing to avoid pressurization issues. During the flight, our kids generally had a good temperament. However, despite that, we would try to avoid short redeyes where possible.

You run the risk of your child disrupting others without you knowing

There’s another reason that redeyes are tough and it’s you as the parent. Everyone boards a redeye thinking of getting some amount of rest. You’re tired after a long day and are ready to drift off. But that conflicts with your ability to assist if there’s a problem involving your child. Are you a deep sleeper and unable to wake up? Are you perhaps more cranky, with impaired decision-making ability because you didn’t get enough rest?

This can be a stressful situation, and if you’re asleep, you can’t help out all that easily. It’s actually a problem that’s easier if you have an infant in arms. They will generally sleep at your seat with you, so you wake up when the child wakes up. The problem amplifies a bit when the child graduates to their own seat and you have to deal a problem that’s harder to monitor.

To the extent possible, keep the child seated immediately next to an adult. Instruct the child to go to you for anything right from the start.

If you get any sleep, consider it a bonus. Don’t go in knowing you’re going to get a good amount of rest.

What about intercontinental first class?

‘True’ first class–you know, the ritzy cabins filled with over-exuberance and bling–follows many of the same rules. People are still generally understanding if you continue to follow the guidance above. The good news is that these flights typically are long in length, so again there is generally enough time to get sleep.

However, you might be met with more restrictions from the airline:

• Emirates restricts children age 8 or younger from flying in first class when redeeming miles. Apparently those with wealthy parents paying cash are fine.
• Malaysia Airlines once restricted children under 2 from flying in first class. The airline no longer operates a first class cabin, instead calling it a Business Suite product. With the rebrand, the restriction is gone (for now, at least).

With fewer passengers, you get much better service from the flight attendants. And in our experience, they’re more attentive if a child has a specific need. They do a good job with helping to calm the situation quickly. I wouldn’t rely on them, but having backup from the flight crew who is more than happy to assist.

In summary

Your child is welcome to fly in business class, but you as a parent need to follow a few rules:

• Make an effort to manage your children on the flight should there be a problem. This is the most important rule.
• There is no need to proactively apologize for your child as long as you put in the effort.
• Avoid redeyes where possible, especially short ones where sleep for everyone under perfect conditions is not enough.
• Teach your children empathy and how to behave before getting into the cabin.

In truth, many of the same principles apply regardless of which cabin you’re flying. It also applies to adults too–don’t drink alcohol if you don’t know how to control yourself when intoxicated. And if you require more than one seat, don’t buy just one seat.

After all, our view is that a passenger is a passenger, no matter how small.